Tiny Triumph

During my first year of grad school, I had to do a presentation on Foucault's Power/Knowledge. I didn't get it at all and spent hours and hours rereading with my dictionary in my lap. I literally cried. I had quit smoking a couple of months before, but I found myself in my car, driving to the gas station, and buying a pack of Camels without even thinking about it.

Since then, I cringed at the sound of Foucault's name. And blamed him for my failed attempt at becoming a non-smoker.

I'd like you all to know that I just finished a reading response of his Biopolitics lectures and didn't want to light up even once. I don't know what I'm happier about--that I pretty much understood what I read, or that I'm finally really a non-smoker. So there, Foucault. So there, RJ Reynolds.

Oh, the shame!

I've prided myself for some time now on my ability to organize my life via excel spreadsheets (see here)...but the thing is, it doesn't matter how effective the columns are or how intuitive the color coding is, if you don't update them, they don't work.

The problem is, I can't remember who I got rejections from over the summer. Between the traveling and the packing, the mail got opened and thrown into a pile. Who knows which pile? I think I managed to pay all my bills, but I did not manage to keep track of my rejections.

Now, between my bad records, the fact that I moved, and that I think my last batch of SASEs had $.41 stamps on them, I have a feeling that I'll never know which poems are still out there in the world.

Anybody ever been in this position? Do you query, even though you might have already gotten a rejection? Do you just put those poems aside and wait? Or do you assume the worst and put them back into circulation?

I need a new system anyway. The old one is a mess.

Getting back on track or I Love Excel Spreadsheets

Well, enough talk about smoking and dress shopping. Back to the real topic of my blog. Poems!

Last night, I organized my word files and updated my submission records in Excel. I added a worksheet titled "all poems" so that I could track every draft that I have in progress and what stage it is in. Granted, I will be as likely to keep this spreadsheet up-to-date as I am to suddenly sprout wings and fly, but the dorky admin in me loved every minute of compiling my data. And, even better, it turns out I have almost 100 poems in some form. Only about 15 that I think are ready for public consumption, but 100 to work with. Theoretically, I don't have to write any new poems for my thesis, I just have to revise the ones I've got. Theoretically, I say. In reality, probably 20-30 of these "poems" are nothing more than rants or laments and they may have a line or two worthy of keeping. I'm still pretty psyched that there are 100 lines of data on my spreadsheet, regardless.

The other thing I'm proud of about all this Excel business? I realized that I have 12 poems out in submission land being considered. That's the most I've ever had out at one time! (I know, small potatoes for you professional submitters, but a big deal for this rookie.)

Next on my poetry to do list...learn how to use metaphors!